First highlight of the afternoon: seeing a man helping a little boy pee into a paper cup. Right up against the door of the restaurant where we had lunch. Sadly, no photo.
Then we ventured out into the mall and saw this sparkly Christmas tree decorated with Swarovski crystals.
Everybody was getting their picture taken in front of the tree, so we did too.
After braving Williams-Sonoma and Indigo, we had fun filling in false information at a ScotiaBank kiosk that was trying to sell us a credit card. Dr. Sara Funbuckets, Suite 15000, 0 RUCrazy St, Dildo, ON, H0H 0H0, yearly income $200,000+. Let's get out of here before they catch us!
Time to try out a Tempurpedic mattress at Sears. Unfortunately we didn't have the $2000 or a large enough knapsack to purchase one.
Next, we got a great demo of a carbonator-thing which you use to make your own soda water. The little South American Sears lady explained that one cylinder can make 60 litres of soda water. IF you just use 3 squirts of gas per litre; in her family, they use 5 squirts. A very gassy family.
Taking the elevator from the 3rd floor to one below main, I thought how horrifying it would be if the elevator, which was full to capacity with a couple of mega-strollers and a toddler with reindeer horns that played a grating electronic Silent Night, were to stall.
Yes, that is the back of Dr. Funbuckets' (grey!) head; no, that is not her manicured hand holding a sippy cup.
Leaving the Eaton Centre via the 7th circle of hell:
Let's go to the LCBO* (*liquor store)...
What a shame it's impractical to ship this lovely cactus bottle of tequila across the country as a Christmas present.
Ditto this classy saxophone-shaped bottle of vodka:
Time to go home.
Alas, no picture of Dr. Funbuckets with a Santa-satiated toddler draped over her knee on the subway. Toddler's mom: "Reese, we don't touch other people with our hands." Dr. Funbuckets (thinking): "Lady, this kid is touching me with his whole body!"
Good times.
5 comments:
Well this was fun. I love the tempurpedic picture and I can feel your pain in the parting shot.
Yes, I would say you were INSANE to do that. Time to come to the sanity of BWV. g
ooooooh, sparklies!
Not just the tree, either - gosh you two have such nice teeth!
Bet you won't make that mistake again. Although I'm glad you did, it's giggle inducing. Loved it.
Heee-larious!! Kelly, you've captured exactly how I feel about malls, Christmas shopping, and fake names. I love the back-of-head shot with the teeny painted-nailed hand. Hahahaha!
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